Outline

  1. Lede
  2. Indiana burial law and Collins Jr. history
  3. Begins digging
  4. More digging
  5. Day of the funeral
  6. Funeral motorcade
  7. Entering the cemetery
  8. Casket removed from hearse. Description of vault.
  9. Prayer and music at funeral
  10. Shots fired in unison
  11. Genuine vs fake buglers
  12. Taps
  13. Should you close your eyes?
  14. Return to grave to fold flag
  15. “He had kids”
  16. Folding flag, hands shaking
  17. Folding flag, shells inserted
  18. Flag inspected
  19. General attending funeral
  20. “It’s ok not to be fine”
  21. Approaching Missie
  22. Presenting the flag
  23. Meaning of the folding of the flag
  24. “This flag is presented on behalf of a grateful nation and the United States Army in appreciation for your loved one’s honorable and faithful service.”
  25. Service owner, mourners leave
  26. Collins buries the body
  27. Gail Bond sits at church
  28. Needs a cigarette
  29. Bond’s losses
  30. Those who remain (in the church)
  31. Why they came
  32. What one could learn about Joey
  33. David and Tim Barclay introduced
  34. 3 mile procession assembles
  35. “the biggest we’ve seen”–decide to shut down highway
  36. The Patriot Guard
  37. Sergeant Charles Dunaway (who carries medals and accompanies hearse) introduced
  38. Procession begins
  39. Townspeople observe
  40. Joey used to work at the steel forge and looked like that mechanic
  41. Joey’s best friend Ryan Heacock
  42. How they became friends
  43. Helping each other out
  44. Would sell Joey my paintings
  45. Designing Joey’s tombstone
  46. Pulled onto the interstate. More mourners
  47. “I can’t even tell you what that meant to our family,”
  48. Tough times and tough love
  49. Went to Jacksonville
  50. Ryan visits Jacksonville
  51. Asks to come back home
  52. Joey comes home. Gets a job, gets back with Missie
  53. Not making ends meet, joins the Army
  54. “He always thought a whole lot of Micah,” Ryan said.
  55. Army suited him
  56. Last visit and last picture at Christmas 2006
  57. “When he got ready to go on the plane, I thought, You’re standing so tall, you like yourself, you’re proud of yourself,” she said.
  58. Coming home in a different way
  59. Open the casket
  60. Family looks at the body
  61. Mason ring, realize hand is missing
  62. Jim Staggers, Army chaplain
  63. Honorable transfer
  64. Staggers confronts grief, calling to be a chaplain
  65. “What would I want for my wife and kids if I were the one not to make it back?”
  66. Preparing the family
  67. Deducing from the weight of the casket
  68. Game face
  69. “Pick out a flower”
  70. Pallbearers withdraw
  71. Psalm 46
  72. Missie weeps
  73. “Daddy’s here.”
  74. Staggers weeps
  75. “You can’t deny your humanity.”
  76. Signals honor guard to transfer casket to hearse
  77. Procession begins, honor guard departs
  78. Preview of 2 men’s future
  79. “Steve Greene picked up the phone in late November 2006. It was the Pentagon.”
  80. Greene and Kalitta Charters
  81. Soldiers’ remains  formerly shipped like parcels, introduce John and Stacey Holley
  82. Holley Provision
  83. “Auditioning” Kalitta
  84. Kalitta prepares for duty
  85. Kalitta crews
  86. “Once you’re in the plane, you’re just flying”
  87. Common/uncommon routes
  88. Carrying Joe Montgomery
  89. “The smaller the town the bigger the turnout”
  90. “Always”
  91. Negative experiences on first flights
  92. Busy time in May
  93. Unbuckle from seats
  94. Family sees the casket
  95. “That was the hardest part”
  96. Why Linton doesn’t stand in the open door
  97. “Some flights Jones and Linton remember more clearly than others”
  98. Introduce Major Cory Larsen
  99. Charles C. Carson Center for Mortuary Affairs
  100. “Some people are broken here,” said Karen Giles, the director of the Carson Center. “But there are a lot of repeaters. We’re very protective of each other.”
  101. Describe Giles
  102. Describe the center
  103. “It includes, in part”
  104. Lists of deceased in various conflicts/tragedies
  105. Operation Iraqi Freedom names, including Montgomery
  106. Montgomery still in aluminum transfer case
  107. Explosive Ordnance Disposal Room
  108. Unpacking the case and logging body/effects
  109. “No personal effects were found on Sergeant Montgomery’s body”
  110. Counseling and meditation
  111. Chaplain David Sparks
  112. “The chaplains are back there with us every single day,” Larsen said. “Everyone appreciates that.”
  113. Montgomery officially identified
  114. Autopsy begins
  115. Autopsy findings
  116. Embalming suite
  117. Mortuary practices
  118. “viewability”
  119. Mortician “puts Montgomery back together”
  120. Anecdote from Sparks–“His mother washed his hair the first time, and I’m washing it for the last time.”
  121. “It’s very intimate,” Sparks said. “Preparing remains is a very intimate thing. This is hands-on.”
  122. Placed in casket/dressed
  123. Karen Giles anecdote (cremated soldier)
  124. Draping the flags
  125. Introduce Major General Richard P. Formica
  126. Requirements about generals
  127. Boeing 747
  128. Waiting for the plane
  129. Religion
  130. K-Loader/Red Carpet
  131. Honor guards march to jet
  132. Different planeloads
  133. Moving cases
  134. Sparks’ prayers
  135. “But on this evening, his voice was strong and clear”
  136. Prayer
  137. “We are proud to welcome home these fallen heroes, to share the grief of their families, and to offer our honor and respect.
  138. “Now, as always, we pray for a time when we are not cursed by terrorism and when young men and women do not die in war.
  139. “This we pray in the name of the Prince of Peace.
  140. “Amen.”
  141. Carrying cases off the lift
  142. “This is the most important thing I’ve ever done,” Sparks would say later of his job here. “I may never do anything more important.”
  143. Driven to mortuary
  144. Introduce Staff Sergeant Terry Slaght
  145. KIA
  146. Finding out Monty was dead
  147. “I should have been there.”
  148. Baghdad International Airport
  149. Body transferred from helicopter
  150. Identifying the body
  151. Montgomery’s and Slaght’s travels
  152. Micah Montgomery hears news
  153. Micah calls his aunt
  154. “Hi, A.V. It’s me, Micah.”
  155. “I know…. Why are you calling here?”
  156. Unlike his brother, Micah rarely called home from Iraq and never called Vicki. Her heart had begun to pound.
  157. “It’s about Joey.”
  158. “What about Joey? Is everything all right?”
  159. “No,” he said.
  160. Asks Vicki to go to Gail’s house
  161. Wives begin to gather in Alaska
  162. The wait for news
  163. Vicki arrives at Gail’s
  164. “No, no, no, no, no, no…” Gail said, beginning to cry.
  165. Vicki began to cry, too.
  166. “Which one?” Gail asked.
  167. Vicki could only mouth the word: “Joey.”
  168. Phones begin to ring
  169. Ryan calls Missie before she knows
  170. “Missie,” Ryan said, “I’m so sorry.”
  171. Then Ryan heard the clatter of the phone on the floor.
  172. Women help Missie. “A second round of waiting”
  173. Official news arrives for Missie
  174. Gathering of neighbors and family at Gail’s
  175. “At four o’clock in the morning, there came the knock at their door.” (Gail)
  176. Sgt. Montgomery, night of his death
  177. Everyone in the truck
  178. Thinking about phone conversation with family
  179. Speaking with Missie when he heard an explosion
  180. “Oh, my God, I’ve got to go,” Joey had said, and he’d hung up
  181. Anxious wait
  182. “I’m ok” email
  183. The drive
  184. Turn onto Red Wings
  185. Road turns to dirt
  186. Patrol Base Red
  187. Confirm night’s mission
  188. “If he didn’t have Copenhagen, I don’t think he would go on the mission,” Ross said later.
  189. Farmer’s cache of weapons
  190. Roles assigned
  191. Moving out
  192. Walking down the road
  193. ADA ruins
  194. Rudberg tells Montgomery to slow down
  195. Path in the grass
  196. “Two sounds broke open the night:
  197. “Crack, then BOOM.
  198. “It was impossibly loud, “the loudest noise I’ve ever heard in my life,” Goodwin said.”
  199. Ross and Gilliland fall
  200. “Ross couldn’t hear Gilliland yelling at him, “Ross, are you hit? Ross, Ross!”
  201. “Gilliland thought it was Ross who’d been hurt.”
  202. “Then you two started screaming his name,” Meeks recalled later.
  203. “We couldn’t see Monty,” Ross said.
  204. IEDs often planted in clusters
  205. “Come in 11”
  206. Can’t find Monty
  207. M4 stripped down by the force of the blast
  208. Grab hold of what felt like a uniform
  209. “That’s when he saw Sergeant Montgomery. His eyes were open, but his body stopped at the waist.”
  210. “I knew he was gone,” Gilliland said
  211. “Ross staggered over and saw him, too. “There was nothing we could do. We just knew.”
  212. “I remember seeing his blank stare,” Rudberg said. “It’s all so surreal, too, because you have to see it with that fucking night vision.”
  213. “It doesn’t look good”
  214. They never found all of him
  215. Taking turns carrying the stretcher
  216. Only Gilliland refused to be spelled
  217. Just kept walking
  218. “No one spoke.”
  219. “Some of them were in shock.”
  220. “All of them were covered in blood.”
  221. Meet with a sniper team
  222. Medic puts body in bag
  223. Drive back to Falcon
  224. Someone breaks news to Micah, he leaves for home
  225. Bostick only spoke with Micah after his own brother dies
  226. Drove through gates of Falcon
  227. “That’s when I lost it,” Meeks said
  228. “That’s when most of us broke down,” Ross said. “I’ve never been that emotional in my entire life.”
  229. Chaplain identifies body
  230. Prayer
  231. Burn uniforms
  232. Last time the platoon saw Montgomery

Outline

Outline

  • Don Collins sits outside planning the next plot he needed to dig for a casket.
  • Collins had grown up helping his family run the funeral home with his brothers. He preferred to work outside.
  • Collins grabbed a shovel and made his first dig into the ground.
  • He protected the ground around the hole with plywood. He took the pieces of earth to the far corner of the Scottsburg Cemetary
  • The next day, a vanload of soldiers showed up for the funeral. They stood in formation and took their places.
  • The hearse took a longer route than the soldiers did to get to the cemetery from the church
  • At 1 o’clock the heart arrived at the cemetery with a crowd of people waiting for it.
  • The soldiers lifted the casket from the hearse to the lowering machine. The casket was in a special vault designed specifically for soldiers. The soldiers took their weapons from the pile.
  • There was a prayer, a bagpipe rendition of “Amazing Grace,” three recorded songs, and then Dawson gave the soldiers their signal.
  • The seven soldiers fired three volleys each in unison.
  • Leatherbee described as a genuine bugler
  • The playing of the bugle, differences between different bugle players
  • Open or closed eyes when playing the bugle at a funeral
  • Soldiers folded the flag
  • Description of the folding of the flag (for 4 graphs)
  • Flag was inspected
  • Flag handed to the general officer assigned to attend funerals
  • General Officer’s interaction with the wife of the fallen soldier
  • Officer drops to her knees in front of wife to give her the flag
  • Meaning of the flag
  • The end of the service
  • Don Jr. brings dirt back from far side of the cemetery and placed the temporary metal marker on the head of the grave
  • Gail (soldier’s mom) remembers the soldier’s Baptism as one of the firsts in the church
  • Gail’s cigarette kit and smoking addiction
  • The many losses of Gail’s life
  • Joe’s Family that was still alive and at the funeral
  • Attendees of the funeral
  • Why Joey joined the army
  • The escort from the airport to the funeral home
  • The long procession at the airport
  • The biggest procession the policemen had ever seen
  • The Patriot Guard
  • The Sergeants in the escort
  • Gail’s car in the procession
  • People crying for them on the sidewalks
  • Joey’s work at the steel forge
  • Joey’s best friend crying while driving thinking of their friendship
  • They became friends in high school
  • How they helped each other
  • Joey buying ryan’s art
  • Ryan designed tombstones
  • The procession down the highway, families saluting
  • Meant a lot to the family
  • Explains how life was hard for Joey after high school
  • He went to live with his sister
  • Ryan came to visit him there
  • Joey wanted to come home
  • Joey came home and got his life together
  • Joey and Missie had kids and didn’t have enough money
  • Joined the army in 2005
  • He joined to be like his brother
  • Joey was able to provide for his family
  • The last time Gail saw Joey
  • Joey was proud of himself
  • Back to the procession
  • They opened the casket at the funeral home and decided to show the family
  • Gail needed proof
  • Mason gave Joey his ring
  • Enter Jim Staggers
  • Staggers came from Indianapolis with the funeral detail. Waited fro the “Honorable transfer”
  • Stagger read the bible behind the hangar. Used the bible for comfort.
  • Today as a return
  • Details of the ritual
  • The way lifting caskets gives information to guardsmen
  • Keep their “game faces” despite what they learned from the casket
  • Sight of children
  • Staggers thought of his own wife and children
  • Invited the family to approach the casket
  • Family interacts with the casket.
  • Staggers held back tears
  • Carried the casket to the hearse
  • Reflect on the ceremony
  • Two of the people in the van would be sent to Iraq

Part Two

  • Steve Green answered a call from The Pentagon
  • Making plans with the Air Force
  • How deceased soldiers used to be transported
  • Campaign to change the way the Army handles deaths
  • Kalitta had already done some work fro the Army
  • Greene asked if Kalitta could handle all the flights of deceased soldiers in the same way he did Tucker and Manchaca
  • Randomly assigned crews for the assignemtns
  • Some routes have been flown many times
  • First time the men flew into Seymour/
  • They had 2 stops to make
  • The smaller the town, the bigger the turnout
  • Spoke about a funeral where neither parent showed up
  • Crowds have grown over time
  • Sergeant Betty checked the paperwork when they landed
  • Joey’s family had been waiting for hours
  • Waiting was the hardest part
  • They transferred the casket off of the plane
  • Pilots have gotten less emotional
  • First time Major Cory Larsen was in the Port Mortuary at Dover Air Force Base
  • Larson worked in the port
  • Those that work there are protective of each other
  • Karen Giles has worked there since 2003
  • Description of the building
  • She prepared Joey to be returned home
  • First into the EOD Room
  • Process of cleaning the body
  • No personal effects on the body.
  • The atrium of the building has a counseling and meditation section
  • David Sparks talked about his conversations with people in the atrium
  • Arrival of Sergeant Montgomery
  • Autopsy
  • Description of the autopsy
  • Wounds were documented and recorded. Eyes were closed.
  • Continuation of preparing the body
  • Preserve Viewability
  • Put them back together as best as they could
  • The story of a mortician cleaning a dead mans hair tenderly
  • Placed the body in a casket
  • Story of a preparation of a body even though it was to be cremated
  • Placement of the flag is the last step
  • Enter Major General Richard P. Formica
  • General officer must attend every funeral and greet every plan landing with dead soldiers in its hold
  • Formica’s turn
  • The entire group that is waiting for the plane to land
  • Chaplain Sparks tells a story relating it to the bible
  • K-loader enters the platform
  • Honor guard marched out
  • It doesn’t get easier
  • Honor guard moves one case at a time
  • Spark’s voice
  • Speech / prayer by Sparks
  • Cases are carried off the plane
  • Sparks believed this is his most important work
  • Formica gets choked up talking about the day
  • The cases were taken to the Port Mortuary

Part Three

  • Enter Sergeant Terry Slaght, Sergeant Montgomery’s friend
  • Slaught was with Joey’s body in the plane
  • Slaght arranged the flight after Joey passed away in action
  • When Slaght realized it was Monty
  • Listened to the drum of the helicopter as he thought about how he should have been there
  • Arrival at the Baghdad International Airport
  • Loaded Sergeant Montgomery onto the truck
  • Transport from the airport to the base
  • Review of the mission the night before
  • Monty needed his Copenhagen to do any mission
  • The mission was dangerous
  • Monty’s squad was in the front
  • Monty was teased for his age
  • They started on their walk wearing night vision glasses
  • They felt and saw bunkers
  • They felt like they were being watched
  • A blow was made
  • Thought Ross was the one injured but it wasn’t
  • They couldn’t find Monty
  • They found his rifle but not him
  • They found him and knew he was dead
  • Night vision made it surreal
  • They deemed it a KIA
  • Took turns carrying him
  • They couldn’t find all of him
  • Everyone was surprised Ross was ok from the explosion
  • The platoon was in shock
  • They carried him for an hour
  • They collected all of his things from his person and put him in a body bag
  • Bostick thought about Joey’s family
  • Bostick didn’t speak to Micah for two months
  • He was brought to the morgue
  • They prayed
  • No one in the platoon could sleep
  • They last time the platoon saw Joey was the next morning

Module 8: Structure

Introduction: 

Ultimately your goal with any story is to make it so compelling that your reader gets all the way through it. That means, of course, structuring it coherently and giving it a beginning, middle, and end.

Learning objectives:

  • Understanding how great writers structure stories
  • Critiquing the structure of peers’ stories
  • Applying lessons on structure to own work

Steps to completion:

Background:

  • Read “The Things that Carried Him” and develop a paragraph by paragraph outline of it, summarizing each graf. Post in Module 8 with the tag “outline” by Oct. 24.
  • Writing Tools Part III
  • John McPhee: Beyond the picnic-table crisis
  • Find a story from the Don van Natta list or elsewhere. Find an example of the advice offered by Clark or Blaine and write a short blog post explaining in Module 8 with the tag “structure advice” by Oct. 26.

Reflective:

  • Class discussion Oct. 25: Discussing structure
  • Class discussion Oct. 27: Peer discussion on structure

Exploratory

  • Complete draft of news analysis due 11.9.
  • Complete draft of pick-em due 11.11.
  • Revise profile by 11.14